Scene Analysis #8 - Hyperion by Dan Simmons

Greetings Persistent Writers! Here is my latest analysis: Hyperion by Dan Simmons.

As a refresher from my copywork blogpost (click here to read the full post), here is the color coding on the highlights:

• Orange for Action beats
• Green for Descriptions
• No highlights for Dialogue
• Yellow for Summary/Transition
• Blue for Thoughts
• Pink for Authorial/Narrator Intrusion
• Purple for Exposition

A double highlight means that a sentence is functioning with more than one mode.

We start with concrete beats. The Consul wakes up from his cryogenic fugue and observes his surroundings. He is then addressed by the Templar, Het Masteen. This transitions to abstract beats as the narrator tells us something about the Templar, who is the True Voice of the Tree. After introducing the Templar to us, we return to concrete beats with the Templar telling the Consul that the “others” have awakened as well. The Consul observes the room he is in, which the narrator describes to us.

We enter the Consul’s mind, transitioning to abstract beats. The Consul is recalling how the treeship Yggdrasil looks like before entering cryogenic fugue. His thoughts gives us a description of the Yggdrasil, like “kilometer-long,” “leafy bulk,” “countless platforms,” etc.

His thoughts are interrupted as the Templar tells the Consul that the “others” awaits.

We transition to concrete beats. In here, we get to see characterization of the Consul as he dresses up with his semi-formal garb and donning his Hegemony epaulets, hinting to us that he is a military man. As he stares at his reflection, we get a description of what he looks like.

The Consul and the Templar begin their trek to the meeting room. While on their way, the Consul continues his observation of the treeship’s interior.

The Consul and the Templar converse about the Consul’s ship, which would be their ferry down to the planet Hyperion. More description is relayed to us as the Consul notices the “glowbirds nestled like Japanese lanterns,” “fireflies from Old Earth” and “gossamers from Maui-Covenant.”

As they are carried away by a basket lift, we go inside the Consul’s mind. He notices that there are no other passengers in the treeship, that the “branches should be crowded with gawking passengers.” The Consul mentions this to Templar, and the Templar informs him that he and the “others” are they only passengers.

The Consul is in deep thought once more, revealing to us that the treeship Yggdrasil is a luxury spacecraft. Utilizing it as a rescue ship would mean a financial loss for the Templar Brotherhood.

The scene continues on, but I had stopped at this natural break. The Consul’s goal in this scene is to meet with the other pilgrims. No conflict is present as it’s an introductory scene.

The author’s goal in this scene was to introduce the main character and Het Masteen, and they hint at the “others.” The author also introduce the treeship Yggdrasil, giving us a detailed picture of the exterior and interior, revealing to us that it’s a luxury ship usually boarded by affluent passengers.

The POV is in third-person, and as far as the exercise is concerned, it appears to be third-person objective. The narrator doesn’t give personal commentaries, so they are detached from the characters. The narrator only relays what the character is thinking directly or indirectly. An example of indirect thought is on page 1 when “the Consul realized that he was being addressed by Het Masteen…”

One of the novel’s theme is rebirth. The opening scene captures that theme as the Consul wakes up from his fugue, groggy and not fully conscious.

Below is a graph of the narrative modes of the copied scene. This shows the rhythm between abstract and concrete beats. It scales from -3 to +3 with the following sequence respectively: Exposition (as -3), Intrusion, Thought, Transition (as 0.5), Description, Dialogue and Action (as +3).



There you have it folks! Please follow my twitter account (link below) to get an update on the next analysis. As always, keep writing.

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